I don't know if I'm going to have any time to blog about something pointless today, so I'm going to do that copy and paste thing. Here's an old review I did on a horrible book that I didn't actually read.
Rainbows, by Katherine Stone -- My review.
This is quite possibly the worst book I've ever had the misfortune to set eyes on. (The irony of that statement proceeds this sentence.) I even took it upon myself to go back through each chapter and highlight every mention of "eyes" in the entire book. I began this process over five years ago, but I just picked it back up a few days ago and realized why I never finished. Because the book was so unbearable. Anyway, I have the number of mentions for eyes in the whole book now. About 472 times. Just when I was starting to wonder if she did this in other novels, I found the preview of "Promises." The answer to that is a resounding yes. She managed to talk about eyes 27 times. She both directly stated the word and implied it frequently. It is safe to say that the "eyes" have it in her books. I never realized how much eyes could talk to each other, or how much they talk to other body parts. Or that people smile at other's eyes and not at each other. How Stone manages to remember the color of each of them is beyond me. That is a feat in itself.
I wonder if any of the other reviewers even read the book? Or maybe I just have really high expectations. Which is true, I do. But I also think that any middle school student could write a better story, and I'd probably find their writing styles a lot more enjoyable to read.
In conclusion, this book makes me want to gauge my EYES out.
If the author of that book ever reads this, I think you should personally pay everyone back that actually read this book. One dollar for every eye mentioned. $472. Pay up.
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